Before I was a photographer, or a mum, I was a teacher for 15 years.

Here are 5 things I always do to engage kids in family sessions.

1. Prioritise connection and engagement first.

The best way to do that is to watch what the kids are doing, then show some curiosity. Join their game. If they’re really focused on making mud potions in the cubby, I won’t ask them to leave what they’re doing to join a family portrait, I’ll ask them if their café is truly as dreadful as the reviews suggest, and ask them to make me their specialty.

This isn’t just for me to follow, I want the parents to put their phones away, forget about their expectations for the session and be present with their kids.

Cameras haven’t even come out of the bag yet.

2. Let them have some autonomy over what they wear.

More important than kids wearing particular clothes is that they have freedom to move, they are comfy, and they feel themselves in what they’re wearing. Nothing itchy or restrictive and unless they are excited by a new outfit, nothing unfamiliar. This morning I made sure to photograph a little boy in his spiderman costume with undies on his head before he got dressed into ‘photo clothes’ because that’s who he is.

3. Invite them into the photo making process.

Kids are used to their parents taking heaps of phone photos, often saying ‘cheese!’ or smiling for the camera. That’s really different from what we do together – usually they won’t be looking at me, and with film they can’t just see themselves right away.

Kids are fascinated by film cameras, and they are creative and uninhibited by conventions. So, I give them a point and shoot film camera and ask them to photograph their parents, or something they love. I always include those photos in the final gallery.

I invite them to come up with fun ideas for photos throughout the session, and they love getting to work together – it gives it a real sense of play.

4. Play imaginary & improv games

We do a LOT of these. I don’t have a set list or anything, I just make them up on the spot most of the time (this is where the teaching experience comes in handy – reading the energy in the room and inventing a game on the spot was always my go-to move in the classroom).

Examples:

“I think you’re a fossilied dinosaur, but you’re actually just asleep and when you hear my camera click it wakes you up and you have to run and scare me!” 

“You’re camping and I work for Parks Victoria and there’s been a big noise complaint from Campsite B. I’m coming to ask you all to leave but you refuse to leave.” 

OK, my kids invented this and I have to do a really broad Aussie man voice and kick them all out and they bloody LOVE it.

5. Meet them where they are.

This means respecting every kid’s personality, needs and feelings. Observing what makes them feel safe and happy and creating space for that. Not forcing eye contact, letting them gravitate to one parent, watching their energy and hunger levels and constantly adapting my ideas for shots accordingly. Sometimes this means I never make it back to doing a particular shot, but that’s ok. Sometimes honouring kids’ needs leads to something way better. 

This morning, I really wanted a photo of a little boy in front of his painting. But he wanted to play outside. Instead, we all followed his lead and went outside.

The dog took a massive dump right in front of me, and the photo I got instead is the family laughing at the dog pooping in the foreground. Not a shot I could have (or would have!) planned, but pretty iconic nonetheless.

Be open, follow their lead, improvise and adapt.

I love photographing families in a way that creates space for kids to just be themselves. If that sounds like your family, you can learn more about booking a family session here.